“Hear, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord is one! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.” (Deuteronomy 6:4-9)
Children are the blessing of the Lord. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them (Psalm 127). But if we do not diligently teach our children to know God and His word, children can grow out of the blessing phase, right into being a curse. Children who are not taught to know the Lord, and who are not taught the word of God, can become a curse on their siblings, parents, and family – a curse on their neighborhood, a curse on their city, their state, their nation, and ultimately they can become a curse on the entire world (Vladamir Putin, Kim Jong Un, the Ayatollah, etc.). Teaching our children is that important.
Many of the problems that we see in the news each night occur because no one took the time to teach that young man or woman to know God and to know His word when they were little. Now they are fully grown, and it takes several large police officers to get them on the ground and get the cuffs on them. As go the children, so goes the future of our society and our world.
Our Responsibility
Teaching our children to know God and His word may be the single most important thing we do as parents. There is no greater parental responsibility than this. And it is not the Sunday school teacher’s job. It is the parent’s job to do this. It is our job. There are four key areas where we teach our children about God and His word. They are: Relationships, Integrity, being a Playmaker, and Expecting God’s reward.
Relationships
The first thing we teach them is to know God, to have a relationship with Him. They must learn of their need for Christ. Apart from being born again by faith in Jesus Christ, nothing else we do ultimately matters. That is the single most important thing, their relationship with God through Jesus Christ, the “Word” of God. We are also to teach them how to have relationships with others. We teach them the golden rule. We teach them to put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience in their relationships with others (Colossians 3:12-17). We teach them the importance of being a blessing to the world, and not a curse. We teach them to love others, as Christ loves them and gave Himself up for them. (Galatians 2:20) We teach them that God wants faith. Their faith in God through Jesus Christ, which we help them acquire, becomes the bedrock upon which the rest of their life will be built. (Matthew 7:24-27)
Integrity
Secondly, we are to teach them to do good. To be men and women of integrity. Holiness, righteousness, goodness, mercy, perseverance, justice, and a whole list of other virtues and qualities must be taught to our children. We teach them that God wants them to be a blessing to others. We teach them how to have godly character, to be transformed by the renewing of their minds by the power of God’s Holy Spirit. We teach them how to make godly choices in life, and to do the right thing. We teach them wisdom, God’s wisdom, and encourage them to apply it to their lives, to live their lives according to God’s wisdom. We teach them to choose to follow God’s wisdom over their personal desires or the world’s influence when faced with decisions in life.
We teach them to do the right thing not out of fear and pride, but out of gratitude for what Christ our savior has done for us. Tim Keller taught that “Unless you believe the gospel, everything you do will be driven by either pride or fear.” When the virtues are taught using fear as the motivation, the lesson is to do the right thing so we don’t get in trouble, so we don’t fail, etc. The motivation in a fear-based environment is the fear of getting caught, the fear of failure, etc. In a pride-based environment, we are taught that we are better than others, that others may lie, but we don’t, because we are better than that – often leading to a self-righteous life. The Bible teaches us to live a gratitude-based life.
In a Christ based environment, we are taught to be virtuous because Christ died for us, shed His blood for us, to give us the opportunity to have eternal life. We are grateful for all He has done for us, and that is our motivation. We are like the kid in college whose poor mother works three jobs to pay for their schooling. That is a serious kid who goes to class and does their homework, because they are grateful for the opportunity to be there. They understand the sacrifice it is taking for them to be in college. Similarly, we are to understand the sacrifice that it took for us to be born again, and we take virtue seriously, out of respect for the sacrifice our Savior made for us to be here and to be born again.
To Serve and Protect
Training in virtue and character also includes us guarding our children from those things that they are not ready for yet. Certain TV shows, certain cartoons, certain friends, certain video games, etc. must not be allowed to enter into their lives in such a way as to ruin them, just as we do not allow a rotten apple to remain in the fruit basket. It is our job to pray for them and protect them from those forces that wish to harm them. We instruct them, using these things as opportunities to teach them about choosing wisely, explaining to them why they cannot watch a certain show or play with a certain friend anymore, so that they gain understanding and can make their own wise choices when we are not there.
Playmakers
Thirdly, we teach them to be difference makers in the world. A playmaker is someone who changes the outcome for good when they are involved. If a football team’s quarterback is their “playmaker”, and he goes out of the game in the first half, they usually lose the game. A playmaker is a difference maker for good. We are to teach our children to be playmakers, to live life intentionally, with purpose and meaning.
We teach them to seize the day, living lives that count for good. We train them to be men and women of action, playmakers that positively affect the outcome of everything they are involved in. We teach our sons that they have A Battle to Fight, An Adventure to Live, A Beauty to Rescue, and A World to Serve (from Robert Lewis’ Better Man series and John Eldredge’s Wild at Heart book and series). We teach them to be like Jesus in all that they do. We teach them that they are Christ’s workmanship, created for good works.
Expecting God’s Reward
Fourthly, we teach them that they are to expect God’s reward. They are to live their lives well, expecting that God will reward them for it. Herein lies the power to stay the course, to press on to the upward call of Christ Jesus, to persevere even when the going gets tough. Without this component, few make it to the summit. Life becomes too heavy, too difficult, too burdensome. Temptations become too great. The lure and call of the idols of the world will eventually lead them astray. But in the joy of knowing that we will spend eternity with Christ lies the power to persevere, to continue to make godly choices, to resist temptation, to refuse to live for false idols, to press on until we finish the race. We teach them to finish strong. We teach them to have joy, the joy of God, in all that they do. For it is for Him that we do what we do, for His good pleasure.
They are Depending on Us to Teach Them
There is much more that could be said on teaching our children. For example, the importance of practicing what we preach, and living out a godly example for them to follow. Making life fun. Loving their mother and being committed to her 100%, all the days of our lives, taking care of her and cherishing her always. Spending enough time with them to actually teach them, and so on. It would take a book or two to cover all that this short verse commands us to do. Suffice it to say, God feels that teaching our children to know Him and His word is so important, that it is listed here above many other aspects of His teaching and commands to us. It is right at the front of the book, in the introductory paragraph. Our children are the primary mission field that God has placed us in. They are perhaps the most important people that God wants us to teach His ways to.
The Word of God
This verse is directing us to make sure our children learn how to connect with Jesus, “The Word” of God incarnate. We are to teach them how to walk with the spirit, to be led by the spirit in all that they do. Throughout the Bible, we see that men failed to teach their children about God, to be connected to Him, and the results are the days of Noah, the days of Abram, the days of the Babylonian captivity, etc. If we fail to connect our children with “The Word”, Jesus, we are headed for disaster again. It may be our number one mission in life.
Whether you have spent years teaching your children about God, or you have done nothing to this point, it is never too late to teach children to know God and how to walk with Him daily. If your children are young, take the time to do this now. Make the time to do this your number one priority. If they are grown, ask God to show you ways that you can invest in them in a way that will draw them closer to God, help them to be led by His Spirit, encourage them to spend time in His word and in fellowship with other believers. Think of ways to coach and encourage them in their walk with Jesus. And if they are not born again yet, leading them to a relationship with Jesus might be your number one mission in life – ask God about this.
What are some ways you can teach your children to know God? How can you get them interested in His word? What are some ways to help them connect with “the Word”, Jesus Christ? What are some ways you can teach them to be personally led daily by the Holy Spirit? What are some things you can do to be intentional about teaching your children to be virtuous? What are some teachable moments you can take advantage of in their lives to teach them to know and walk with God? How can you leverage holidays to teach them to know God? What are some things you can do to encourage them to learn God’s word for themselves? To make their relationship with God their own? To learn to walk with God themselves? To share Christ with others? To pray? To join a church? To be a difference maker? To expect God’s reward? Ask God what they need and how you can help them in their walk with Him. If your desire is for your children to walk more closely with God, then please join me in the following prayer:
Lord God almighty, ruler of heaven and earth, giver of children, I come before you in Jesus name and ask that you would help me to be a better father to my children and to teach them diligently to know You and Your word. I ask that you would help me to take advantage of teachable moments to show them your ways. Help me to instruct them in your word, and to reveal Your truth to them. I pray that this would be a top priority in my life, and that I would dedicate time to teaching them your ways and showing them how to live godly lives, encouraging them and coaching them as they make their faith their own. Let your hand be upon them for good, and prosper them in all that they do. Protect them from evil, that no harm may come to them. Keep them from idols, and lead them not into temptation, but rather lead them in the everlasting way by your Holy Spirit. I pray that they would make their relationship with You their own, and that they would choose to walk with you all the days of their lives. Lead them with your Holy Spirit daily. Use them as sharp tools in your hands to accomplish your purposes. And may they dwell in the house of the Lord forever. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.
“I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth.”
3 John 1:4
“Everyone who comes to Me and hears My words and acts on them, I will show you whom he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid a foundation on the rock; and when a flood occurred, the torrent burst against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well built. But the one who has heard and has not acted accordingly, is like a man who built a house on the ground without any foundation; and the torrent burst against it and immediately it collapsed, and the ruin of that house was great.”
Luke 6:47-49
“Hear, my son, your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching; Indeed, they are a graceful wreath to your head and ornaments about your neck.
Proverbs 1:8-9
Action Items
Lead each of your children to Christ, personally praying with them to be born again by faith in Jesus.
Take your children through the book of proverbs. Have them memorize verses that they can apply in their lives.
Frame key bible verses and have them on the walls of your home.
Regularly spend time with them talking about God, Jesus, His Word, the gospel, difficult subjects, questions they have, etc.
Come up with ways to encourage them in their walk with Jesus.
Share your life with them – especially the parts about how you came to faith, what you believe, things God has taught you, things God has done in your life, answered prayers, etc.
Look for teachable moments and take advantage of them. Stop the movie and talk about it and how it illustrates something important about life, for example.
Be led by the spirit in all that you do.
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